Diary of a sea gull
A bird's eye view
Sept. 3, 2005
I am close to perfecting the art of precise dropping. So far I have mastered eyeballing the target and my depth perception is as accurate as it can be. All that is left to hone is my ability in guaging wind speed.
Sept. 14, 2005
Made good progress with my training today. I have been hitting inanimate objects about 85% of the time. My goal of 95% accurracy is coming close. After that, I will have my fun. Mwuhahaha.
Sept. 24, 2005
Dammit. I have to stop training for a while since I caught a mild variant of bird flu and should have a week of nest rest or it might get worse.
Oct. 1, 2005
Finally starting to get my strength back. I still couldn't fly up to the altitude I wanted. Maybe I could get back in training in a couple of days.
Oct. 3, 2005
I will start with some basic strength training first. My excretions are still kind of loose anyways so the whole trajectory has been differentiated due to the change in mass form.
Oct. 5, 2005
Yes. My droppings are back to normal and I have began with the precise deliveries once again.
Oct.10, 2005
Great progress I am at 90% accuracy. My training will be complete in no time.
Oct. 16, 2005
I have reached my goal. Tomorrow I will put my training into practice.
Oct. 17, 2005
Success! It couldn't have been more perfect. I started to scout for my first target. I spotted this group of people standing. It seems like they are waiting for something. Of the bunch, I chose this blonde woman. It just seems appropiate that she be my first. Her feathers or what they call "hair" are beautifully arranged. So I circled around and kept my speed constant while I measure the depth and guage the current wind speed. Then I felt the urge to unload. I eyeballed my target locking in her magnificent arrangement of feathers and released the package. Mwahahaha. A direct hit! I ate extra seeds last night causing my feces to be gloriously enormous in preparation for this event. All the hard work and dedication totally paid off. I have to show my new skill to my friends tomorrow. They will die of laughing and envy for sure.
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This entry was posted
on Tuesday, October 18, 2005 at 5:52 PM.
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8:36 AMthis is funny kiko! love it :)
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